Archive for May, 2007

May 21 2007

Iron Hermitage

Published by James under Media

Like children at Christmas we’re counting down the days until that karma wheel turns and Paris Hilton accepts her new job as prison currency. Granted, it’s only 45 days in the can, but that’ll be a month and a half of being secure in the notion that you can finally be jailed for bad taste.
Ever since her sex tape got leaked, Paris has been our very own sacrificial goat and we’ve been loving every minute of it. We’ve placed cameras all around her just to see how insensitive and spoiled she can be. The spectacle is almost Shakespearean in its pathos. She pleaded with Judge Michael T. Sauer in as many sentences as she could string together. Her mother accused Judge Sauer of jailing Paris for a salacious attention grab. Armies of lawyers are trying to claw her waxen corpse from the clutches of the San Francisco Correctional system. Competing petitions to Jail Paris or Free Paris were established (at last count, Jail Paris led by 4000 signatures).
I wonder if the aftermath of this situation will be as satisfying as we hope it to be. Hating Paris Hilton has almost become a national past-time. It has a cleansing effect on those of us who dig the ditches and serve the coffee. We feel proud of our ability to survive in the big bad world without the benefit of a Daddy Hilton or a Carl’s Jr. endorsement deal. Are we ready for the heiress to smarten up?
Prison movies aside, what would you do if you had to spend 23 hours a day in an 8 by 12 foot cell with one hour for exercise and shower each day? I’d probably be able to catch up on all of my reading, and barring prison contraband regulations I could have a portable DVD player and a netflix account. Above all I would get the time to think, a place outside society to adequately prepare for the pitfalls of the outside world. You could say it’s a little bit like grad school.
Is this something we want to happen to Paris Hilton of all people?

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May 13 2007

The Logic of Reverence

Published by James under Media

There is something about Christian literature that makes me feel uneasy. It’s not the mention of God, or Jesus, or even the judgmental characterizations of such beings. Something lurks behind the litany of platitudes. You may pick up on a particularly pedantic trope on how less than total devotion can put your soul dangerously close to hellfire, but it is merely like a dull throe coursing through your jaw on the way to agonizing toothache. There is a critical absence in the rhetoric you see around you.

I found out what that absence was in a book that you won’t find among the copies of Chicken Soup for the Christian Soul and Left Behind. Please bear with the spoilers.

A Canticle for Liebowitz, by Walter M. Miller, Jr., is a book from the old guard of science fiction, before novels had to be 500 pages long to be considered marketable. It tells the tale of an abbey in the Southwestern United States after a nuclear holocaust. The monks within took care of the last vestiges of the modern world, even as they were missing the critical reference material to understand it all. The book is split into three parts, the first telling about the beatification of their patron saint Leibowitz, the second about a new renaissance, when society re-discovers electricity and scientific knowledge, and the third chronicles humanities return to a space-age society and the repetition of the nuclear war.

The book surprised me with its reverence to religion. Works such as Star Trek often paint religion as a barrier to knowledge and understanding, rather than a bridge. The society after the nuclear war tried to destroy the modern knowledge that brought them to that point. The first Abbot Leibowitz was martyred trying to rescue some of the old texts of scientific knowledge. This is inspired by historical accounts of Abbeys in Western Europe preserving texts of the classical Greek masters when the Ancient world collapsed after the fall of the Roman Empire. However, the reverence is tempered with a little dark humor towards the misconceptions of the Abbey’s scholars. Fallout is described as some kind of winged demon desecrating the wombs of young mothers to create the mutants that terrorize the Midwest.

Miller is very clear about the role of the Church in human society. In the second Novella, a scholar from the kingdom of Texarkana (A junction of Texas and Arkansas) postulated that the current human race was descended from a genetically altered slave race created before the war. The monks challenged him on this theory, since it only served to flatter the class system of the time. The Church did not concern itself with matters of science, of the material world. When it comes to matters of the spirit, of morality, religion is used to make a case for humanism and against selfishness.

It was in the third novella that I found what was missing in that Christian bookstore. When the human race achieved modernity again, the governments once again failed to keep their citizens safe from nuclear war. The abbey was used as a field hospital for people injured by the radiation. To the horror of the abbot, the doctor in charge of the hospital tells a mother to take her badly burned baby to a euthanasia center down the road. The abbot tried to stop them, but failed. Unlike the heroes in much of Christian fiction, he himself is in a situation where there was no right answer.

The book was ambiguous about whether the abbot was right or not. He believed with all his heart that this woman should not hasten the death of her child. Later, as he lay dying under a ton of rock from a nuclear attack, he prayed that God did not let him die before he had suffered as much as that child. Too often religion is used to provide easy answers to the problems of the world. I believe that religion in its best form, and its most true form creates more questions than answers. When we see a “thou shalt not” in the Bible, it’s not for us to start stoning people or ignore it. When we ask the right questions and make our own decisions, we achieve the greatest good.

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May 06 2007

The Jaws of Defeat

Published by James under Media

Note to self: It’s never a good sign when TV cameras are milling around, particularly if you are walking to work. One minute you re a fully fleshed out human being with a past, a family, a career. In an instant you become the “man on the street”, John Q. Public, or whomever’s supposed to be speaking out for the concrete proletariat. A reporter from a radio station flagged me down to get my opinion on the issues of the day. My first instinct was to refuse, but then I thought if I didn’t like to be heard, why was I shooting my mouth off on the internet on a regular basis?

It turns out the reason that the news cameras were gathered was to gawk at the high gas prices, currently $1.26 a liter. The reporter wanted to know if I thought they were too high. I didn’t have much of an opinion since the practicum I was going to was in walking distance of my house. When I fill up, I do so in Abbotsford out of the range of pesky GVRD taxes. Even with the taxes, the gas is still too cheap to significantly affect my lifestyle

The insight potential of the price of gas having been exhausted, we moved on to the Canucks, their playoff run cut short just 12 hours before. The reporter wanted to know how upset I was at their performance. Sure their offense was painful to watch, but it wasn’t enough to drive me to take to the streets. I replied, “Living with constant defeat is part of being a Canucks fan”

I think that the best thing about following the Canucks is that every victory is a Cinderella story. The inconsistent performance of the team makes every goal that much sweeter. I’m not sure what it’s like to be a hockey fan in other cities, but because we know that victory can be ripped from our clutches any time, the amount of superstition that follows the Canucks elevates the game to a kind of religion. People stop shaving, wave the towels, put up the flags, some fans even go so far as to bet against the Canucks to use their rotten luck as gamblers to increase Vancouver’s chances.

It just wouldn’t be the same if the Canucks owned the league every year. If could simply trust our team to take home the cup every year, there would be no reason for the yelling, the face paint, or the superstitions. I have a feeling that Vancouver wants that Stanley cup more than any city on the continent. As soon as that game 7 final overtime goal is scored, the player’s shoulder pads will suddenly be able to heal the sick, GM place will be worshipped as holy ground, and homeless people will be waving pamphlets asking you if you have found Luongo.

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