So how am I doing?
I wish there was more to tell you, but things are still going rather well. The day job is still there, the house is still amazing, and my three-year-old has discovered Star Wars. And as it turns out, he is a Jedi like his father before him. Even though I’m living the whole adult lifestyle, with all the responsibilities that it entails, things are pretty quiet. I haven’t had quite a routine like this since I left high school almost 20 years ago. Before, if I wasn’t worried about withering job prospects, I was worrying whether I could save enough money to buy a house, or sell the condo I already owned, or how I could keep my son alive and reasonably well-behaved.
It was only in the last year that all these questions were answered with a resounding yes. Over the past few months, I have had the chance to feel bored for the first time in years. And it feels great!
Still, because life is just fundamentally unfair, I feel like I miss that sense of struggle. I’ve lived with it for so long that I get a little sense of loss as well as a sense of relief. Of course, some other crisis could blunder around the corner and I’d feel like me again, but it just doesn’t feel right to wait for something like that.
I need to strive for something outside of my daily routine. It will help me figure out my own limits, or at the very least keep me sane. I think I can do that through my writing.
I’m not exactly happy with it, and that’s great thing about it. There’s room for improvement. I haven’t done it as much I would like, but that’s because I put most of my efforts into finding and keeping a career. Now that I’m more experienced, I don’t have to busy myself learning every technology, I just have to refine my skills with the tools that will help me with my job. That leaves me time to focus on my other competencies.
So, as of this writing, I have almost completed the first draft of a novel I started a couple of years ago. I’ve been able to finish it by dictating portions onto my phone and having it transcribed by voice recognition software. I decided to keep the writing habit going by recording an audio journal. Most of it is dull and unpublishable, but I found the more I did it, the more I had to say. So, I have two hours a day, to and from work, to write anything I want from the comfort of my car without inconveniencing me, my job, or my family. Of course, I don’t talk while I’m navigating bad traffic, but for the calm spots of my commute, I can write a little bit, every day, without too much interference.
If the material comes out regularly, I can focus on other aspects of my craft. Like if my tone is far too intellectual, or whether I need to start writing fiction, or if there’s an opportunity to get paid for my writing. Money is not the reason I love to write, but if I want a good metric of success, it’ll fit the bill. I can start off by updating this blog once a week, and I’ll look for other places to post my work. To date, I only have one rejection letter from the Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction. That was 15 years ago. For me, the undiscovered country is my writing career, and it’s time for me to start exploring.